"All data is illegal - all you need is the appropriate one time pad"
-- AMAN, 25 September 1998
Sams Big Play Maker is a Win32 program that converts arbitrary text to a (sometimes...) amusing play. It has a number of purposes as identified below. The compiled program + PGP dig sig can be downloaded here!.
What the purpose of this damn program?
As identified above, the purpose of this program is to take arbitrary text (e.g. shopping list, love letters, source code etc) and convert it to a (user-definable play). The output is not Shakespeare, but neither is anything else I write :)
More importantly, it can take a play and revert this back to the original document.
Here's an example:
| http://www.scramdisk.clara.net/ | -> |
Sam says "I love you, no really."
Adam says "Hot steamy grits!" Jason says "Hot steamy grits!" Jason says "No." Phil says "Get off my colon" Harold says "Who said OJ?" Harold says "Who said OJ?" Phil says "Jason paid me for it." JYA says "Jason paid me for it." Adam says "Jason paid me for it." Phil says "But I read slash-dot" Sam says "Ah! An earthling!" Jason says "Show me the fish!" Adam says "So avoid that then!" Adam says "Mine's a pint" Jason says "Well smother me in curry sauce and lick me." Mr Hanky says "Mike - you ladyboy!" JYA says "I said, you've got beautiful eyes." JYA says "Ah! An earthling!" Adam says "I'll be your private dancer, a dancer for money, I'll do what you want me to do." Phil says "But I read slash-dot" Paul says "Show me the fish!" Jason says "Mmmm ... " Mike says "Mine's a pint" Mr Hanky says "So avoid that then!" Harold says "Mine's a pint" Andy says "But I read slash-dot" Paul says "I never talk politics." JYA says "Did he mean to die just then?" Paul says "Hot steamy grits!" JYA says "Who said OJ?" end of scene |
Why would you want to do that?
It is often asserted that source code on paper is protected free speech and that source code on a floppy disk is not. The argument often raised is that source code is not readable by a human.
This program produces output that should be protected free speech, even when the output is held on a floppy disk as the output is simply the outline of a verbose play. Will a court really say that a play is protected speech when held on paper but no longer protected when held on a floppy disk or a web page????
But a judge won't be able to understand the meaning of the play!?
The judge may not identify or understand the context, syntax or semantics of the text, but that is another issue.
Say, for examples sake, that the judge had to rule if a German book was protected free speech. Would he rule that it isn't protected just because he doesn't understand German? Surely not! What if the judge had to rule if a journal on microbiology was protected...Would he rule that it wasn't protected just because he hasn't an understanding of microbiology?
Can the last page of a book be deemed non-protected speech just because the judge doesn't understand the context of the page?
But I don't understand the output!
I don't understand Hamlet, but that doesn't mean that I don't believe that it isn't protected speech!
Where's the source code?
This system is a quick hack and contains some extremely poor coding practice. The source is available here. Good luck :)
Will you be porting this to x / adding feature x?
No. This program is a "proof of concept" type thing that just aims to show the futility of trying to claim that source code is not protected speech.
The program crashes when I do x!
There's a surprise. The program works with parameters included in the program but most likely will not work if you treat it roughly (see the above question!). Some pointers: don't include numbers in any of the wordlist or equiv fields. Include larger words at the top of "Original token" - it just matches the first token found, not the largest!
Do you think this program or its output could be considered in any way illegal?
Do you?
I honestly think not. How can a program used to turn text in one form into another be illegal? Should someone tell AltaVista that Bablefish is also illegal?
How can the output be illegal - it's simply a play.
I represent a large corporation and would like to sue you.
Please send all cease and desist letters to: ssimpson@hertreg.ac.uk
I wish to acknowledge: AJ (code-debugger and superhero), Avoiderman (short), JYA, Jon Johansson, Slashdot, EFF, UK Crypto Mailing list.
This code was inspired by the Prof. Bernstein and Prof. Junger court cases.
AJ - I removed the "G" word ;)